Sunday, July 24, 2011

太讨厌。

有几次那么对自己说:刘倩妏,你能的!
可是又有几次能够真正地相信自己能?
你以为我喜欢那么自卑的自己吗?
我很讨厌这样的自己。
明明去完Camp应该是要更懂得接纳自己。
上帝已经接纳我了,可是我,还是没办法接纳自己。
我也不想对自己那么没有信心的。
我只是习惯了。
要怎么改掉呢?
上帝啊,求你医治我,
让我对自己有信心,
好叫我能够为主你做更好的见证。

想抛弃这种自己,
想更放开自己,
不想再做一些会让自己后悔的事。
因为那种感觉,好难受、好复杂、好心痛。
像是自己被排斥,像是自己已经不再属于自己。

我想更爱自己。真的好想。
好想放肆地大哭一场。
好想放声大喊。

好想知足,好想感恩。

滚开吧你,混蛋、笨蛋、对自己没信心又不懂得知足的刘倩妏!
真的不想再看到你了!!!!

Saturday, July 23, 2011

我从来不知道。

我从来不知道自己可以那么疯狂。哈哈哈。
来到澳洲真的真的多了好多好多的第一次。
第一次离开家到那么远的地方,而且没有爸爸妈妈的陪伴,
第一次认识那么多从不同地方来的人,
第一次觉得食物超级贵,
第一次笨到熬夜想看cyclone, 结果没看到,
第一次跟朋友聊天聊到三更半夜,
第一次考试fail, 而且还一次过两科,(还好心脏负荷的来),
第一次在外国驾车,
第一次跟ah mo同班,
第一次跟韩国人同班,
第一次可以跟整大班的朋友逛街,
第一次跟本来不认识对方的人同住在屋檐下,
第一次一个人搭bus到市区,
第一次抽血,
第一次去过那么多朋友家,
第一次那么晚才回到家,
第一次觉得自己超级无敌不顾形象,
第一次感受到团契满满的爱,感受到团契在我人生中已经扮演那么重要的角色,
我相信,我还会感受到很多很多的第一次。。。

不知不觉,超过半年了。
时间不等人,是残酷的事实。
感谢主我认识了好多新朋友,
认识你们真的是我的福气。

教堂,充满温暖和爱的地方。
每个星期最期待的三天,拜五、六和日,
因为可以去教堂,看见教堂的朋友。
嗯,感谢主自己的带领,让我在外地也可以感受到祂的爱。

祂派了那么多的天使在我身边。
我真的,好幸福。
我到底还奢求什么呢?
主的恩典,一直都够我用,
祂的祝福,也一直福杯满溢。
学习感恩。
学习接纳自己,也接纳别人。

我从来不知道,自己在这里可以那么不顾形象。
之前认识我的人应该认为我很放不开吧,
告诉你们,我,在这里超级无敌霹雳sengei,
我看是没有人要了。哈哈哈。
也许是因为在这里的新环境,认为没有人认识自己吧。
感恩因为我容易适应新环境。

今晚在一位教堂朋友家fellowship..
彼此聊天,彼此了解,是我最喜欢的环节。
当然少不了游戏!

那个猪游戏真的超级刺激,
详细情况懒惰说明。
我只能说筱真超强。超级佩服。
我跟ricky是level 5的猪。
omg, 输的人要被画脸,
没办法,愿赌服输。
欠着先,拜日拭目以待。

p.s. 拜托你们手下留情! T.T

我们竟然在半夜12.30am在shopping centre买groceries,
还在外头拍random照,
还一直对着空气吹气,以为可以看到烟,超酷!
有机会的话,会把照片po上来的啦哈哈哈。
超级random...................


~主的恩典大大小小,主的恩典从头到脚,白白得来,不能忘掉,感谢涌出如浪潮~
Thanks God for every blessings!! 


Friday, July 22, 2011

IT'S ALL ABOUT RANDOM!

Seriously I think I need to have a blog, to note down all the crazy, funny and stupid things that I'd experienced. So that I can laugh when I look back my posts in the future. :D Writing blog can improve our language, to note down our feelings, to let others know more about us and also, we can recall back the blessings that given by God, which are more than enough^^. 每天数算主的恩典,学习感恩,就会知道我们有多么幸福。;]

Tonight, a crazy night. Haha. At first I decided to have our dinner at Karawara, because I stayed at home for the whole day already and I wanted to go out. Ricky said he wanted to go Carousel, but then Xiao Zhen was just coming back from Carousel. I forgot who is the one who said city got late night shopping on Thursday night? So, we decided to go city, randomly. And we just checked for the bus time then we went to city straight away.  And of course we have some random chit chat in the bus. And we even stopped at a random place, a place called England Street (maybe something like that, xD).
When we reached city, we were like...wow, .......so "many people"...kena holan..because all shops were closed. [=.=] But nevermind, because we were RANDOM! hiak hiak hiak. We simply had our dinner at KFC and Hungry Jacks, which was quite random as well. :D We have some random chit chat, random topic, and we saw some random people dancing and singing in KFC. Just don't know why, everything was soooo random tonight, pretty fun. hahahaha.


After that, we walked around and we reached the cinema in the city. Actually we wanted to watch Transformer 3 in 3D, but we missed it, sad. T.T. So, we chose another movie randomly, which started at 9.30pm. Then, we walked to Northbridge and bought bubble tea at EasyWay. (It's raining and we kept running here and there, but actually Northbridge is quite near to the cinema, we just can't find the correct way. But thanks God, we found the correct way at last and thanks God again, EasyWay was open, hahaha.) Then, we walked back again to the cinema for our movie. Again, RANDOM!

I've no comment about the movie. I just can said, we chose a random movie which was a bit wrong. Hahaha because some of the scenes got a bit 18+. >< We should have knew it earlier when we found out that the cinema was full with couples and just three of us are students, silly huh? But it's okay. It gave us a lesson that we will not simply choose the movie next time. Another first time for this year. By the way, I experienced many "first time" in my life in this year. :D hahaha.


And finally, randomly we missed our bus, which actually was at 11.20pm. And we need to wait until 12.05am for the last bus. NEW EXPERIENCE. I still can remember how scared were we, because only three of us walking on the street and with some random people. Perth is quite unsafe actually. Scary. I kept praying in my heart because that's the way I could find peace in my mind. :D We walked as fast as we could to the esplanade busport. Thanks God because we reached there safely.

We met a random friend who came from Thailand at the busport. And we talked about Thailand food, Thai language, her life and other random stuff. Haha. Luckily we're quite good in social........(nah, perhaps ><) haha. And we reached home at 12.35am. WOW THANKS GOD! HAHAHA.

In conclusion, it was a fun and adventurous night, and of course RANDOM night! This is so 难得 because we really won't have this opportunity to be so random during school days. Thanks God in everything that we experienced today. We have learned some new things. It will be our memory in the future.

MANY PEOPLE WILL BE COMING BACK TO PERTH SOON. ;D

OMG we should take photos just now T_T haih, it's over. 

Ivan Lau Wen Wen, I need my camera backkkkkkk haha.(with RANDOM ending too :D)

By R3d@pp|e.